In message <4581fd84$1_4@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>, oldmadbadger
<oldmadbadger@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> writes
>One slightly (ab)used kitten : two careless owners.
>
>Description : black and white hat on head, dirty face, smells of ****.
>
>Answers to the name of : Schmoo, ****face, Hey You Get Down Off There !
and
>What The **** Do You Think
>You're Doing Now You Stupid Retarded Feline !
>
>Mileage : 6 months on the clock.
>
>Condition :Good, no major defects, prone to sucking on hairy sweaters
until
>thoroughly soaked.
>
>Eats : Catfood, Crackers, Curry, Condiments, Crusty French Bread,
Chillies,
>and anything else it can cram into its furry little face
>before vomiting all over the hall carpet.
>
>Likes : Crying piteously for hours on end, Tripping people on stairs,
Loose
>bowel movements, Kangaroo boxing with other cats, Waking humans at 6 a.m.
>
>Dislikes : Being a cat, Litter trays, Affection, Going outdoors, Moving
any
>great distance, Not eating for more than ten minutes at a time.
>
>High maintenance, expensive, unforgiving, crude attention seeking device
>seeks considerate lunatic to furnish life of luxury, only cat crazy
idiots
>need apply to :
>forgodstaketakeitawayivehadenoughwhydidieveragreetothis@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>nfarlesstrouble.com
>
>
You paint such a delightful picture. I'm sure there must be a cat lover
out there who'd take little ****face off your hands.
Just as well I didn't have any cider left or this would have been one
buggered-up keyboard.
Appreciatively,
--
Slips x
---
Slipso at airtight dot demon dot co and don't forget uk
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