"Nexie" <greenknight@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message
news:YMfFf.39960$0N1.13633@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> oldmadbadger wrote:
>
>> in my case, only my grandmother ... she spent ww2 working in a
munitions
>> factory where she tested sten guns, the idea of my nan standing there
>> with a sten gun shooting from the hip is an enduring image and one
which
>> never fails to crease me up ... she also survived being bommbed out of
>> two houses in Liverpool in 1940, on both occasions refusing to leave
the
>> house for the safety of the anderson shelter where she made my father
>> sleep and on the second occasion sleeping through a bomb taking the
>> entire back wall off her bedroom so when she woke up she was staring
>> straight into the garden and the bed was covered in rubble ... they
don't
>> make them like that anymore, she is now approaching 101 and is as sound
>> as a bell and as sharp as a pin and has an 84 year old toyboy in her
>> nursing home who dotes on her, i love her to bits
>
> Old folk are brilliant aren't they? Did you see Nigel Havers on Wogan:
Now
> and Then? (I only watched for Ade Edmondson). One of his anecdotes was
> about researching his role for a doctor character he was playing. He
> observed 7 open-heart surgeries, the last of which was an old lady
having
> a heart-bypass op. The surgeon asked the lady if she minded if Nigel
> Havers attended the operation, to which she replied "Nigel Havers?
Lovely!
> But you will be supervising, won't you doctor?". Bless.
> My Gran always gave me 10p (long after 10p wouldn't buy you anything, in
> such a conspiratorial way, like a politician taking a back-hander) and
> rock-hard chocolate from the fridge when I visited.
the only thing my nan refuses to accept is that rationing finished in 1954
(i think) and still to this day will press toilet roll and tins of beans
on
me in packs of 20 at a time "just in case" ... germany reactivates
operation
seelowe ...
>
>> what is it with kids these days ?, (boy i'm turning into such a
>> misanthropic old scrote) hanging around off licences with hoodies on,
>> dangling from their skate boards and knifing each other for their
mobile
>> phones, bring back national service i say, at their age i was at home
>> building airfix models and watching blue peter on a black and white
>> television in my tank top ...
>
> The first time we had a colour TV, there were only black & white
> programmes on all 3 (!) channels. That kind of thing is very confusing
for
> a child.
>
>> i blame the oestrogenic isophenols in the water supply myself ... "kids
>> with guns ... mesmerised skeletons"
>
> G-sides and the dub remixes of Laika vs Spacemonkeys are recommended if
> you like Gorillaz.
not heard these, but will investigate forthwith ...
> Maybe kids are over 6' tall by the time they're teenagers these days
> because of the change in diet from 50 years ago, but I can't help
feeling
> it's something to do with all the growth hormones and stuff fed to
> livestock. You are what you eat.
tofu, quorn and yogurt in my case then ...
>>> Let's see how long that takes to do the rounds. My record so far is an
>>> appallingly bad joke that I made up when I was 14, and was repeated to
>>> me in a pub 17 years later. The sad thing was, it was so bad I didn't
>>> want to claim responsibility for it. That, and the reasonable
>>> possibility that someone else also made it up.
>>>
>>> In the interest of science, see if you've heard it (and I apologise
>>> whole-heartedly for this)...
>>>
>>> Q: How do you get 4 Anytown* girls on a stool?
>>>
>>> A: Turn it upside-down.
>>>
>>> *insert local sleazy area here
>>
>> i think i heard that in london circa 1980
>
> Phew! That pre-dates me by 4 years. Thank god. I'm not responsible after
> all.
>
>> have you heard about the zen buddhist who goes into mcdonalds and says
>> "make me one with everything"
>
> If a joke is told in a forest with no-one to laugh, is it funny?
>
> A polar bear walks into a pub and says "a pint of............beer,
please"
> The barman says, "Why the big pause?"
>
> A drunk walks into a pub with a monkey on his shoulder. The barman asks
> "Where did you get that?"
> The monkey says "Newcastle, they're all over the place there".
lol to both ...
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