3 April 2008 - John Krasinski, Bode Miller, Cobra Star****p
Jimmy:
Really doesn't care.
Introduction:
China cancelled Celine Dion concert; Dalai Lma says maybe
they're not so bad after all. Hillary Clinton shrew. Floridians old.
Gas is expensive. NBC is planning new shows year round: The Apprentice
6, Gladiator II, and a fourth night of Dateline. Men want fast ***,
including apology (joke also used on Letterman). Bobby Brown says
Whitney Houston drove him to drugs; before Houston, he had to hitchhike.
(That's more like it.) Bush dumb. The Wiggles.
Walkover: Steely Dan, My Old School.
John McCain Old: looking for older running mate, like the Six
Flags guy, or Dumbledore, or the 60 Minutes Cast. Maybe Tomb of Ramses
II. Larry King's father.
Knut, Attention Addict: He takes a hostage.
Cow-Human Hybrid, subject I called before Conan named it: Joel
boos. He did it all the time back on the farm. They're always in the
moo-ooo-oood for love. He's done.
It's 12:40 am and the phone is ringing. Crisis is boring. You
want to hear cheap jokes about the latest celebrity-tart train wreck.
Which host do you trust to give you a trivial, nonthreatening joke?
He'll make you laugh, but he won't make you think!
- I think they remembered it's Al Bell's afcob anniversary
coming up, with a sketch like that.
John Krasinski:
Knut comes out first.
Plane flights are lousy if you have legs. Couldn't swap with
loud, animatronic guys to sit with a friend, and passive-aggressive
customers abound.
Seattle. Weird young woman going 'JOHN KRASINSKI!' A lot.
Leatherheads. No bulking up necessary. Was a prank. Conan
could not gain weight. George Clooney anecdote, didn't hear crowds were
yelling 'JOHN!' instead.
Bode Miller:
Old, doesn't play well with others. They cut off his funding.
He used a gold medal to fix a toilet (holding the seat up). Pu****ng
steam roller by accident. Skiing has tight margins, 3/100ths of a
second ahead of second place for his gold. Great story in striving for
the Olympics.
Cobra Star****p:
Viva La Cobra: Guilty Pleasure.
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